Living Beyond the Story Mind: Dropping the Baggage with Dallas Collis
What if the pain, trauma, and losses you’ve carried for decades weren’t who you truly are, but just a story you’ve been telling yourself? In this powerful conversation, Dallas Collis—16-Hour Coach and “emotional baggage handler”—shares how cancer, addiction, and the collapse of everything he knew became the catalyst for awakening.
At 60, faced with the choice of giving up or starting over, Dallas chose to rebuild. He discovered that healing isn’t about fixing the past—it’s about putting the bag down and stepping into presence. We explore:
- Why we all carry emotional baggage—and how to finally release it
- The difference between thinking and thought (and how awareness changes everything)
- Why blame is the first addiction we must overcome
- How radical self-responsibility creates freedom, peace, and weightlessness
This episode will challenge the way you see your past, your pain, and your power. If you’ve ever felt defined by your story, Dallas offers a simple, profound path forward: live now, without the baggage.
Connect with Dallas
Buy the Book on Amazon (affiliate link)
https://dallascollis.substack.com
https://tictok.com/@dallascollis
https://facebook.com/dallascollis
https://instagram.com/@fit5life
Want premium clients from your content?
Grab a free Client Acquisition Audit and I’ll show you exactly where your message, offer, and CTA are leaking conversions—and the 3 fixes to turn your podcast/Substack into a client pipeline.
👉 Book here: https://coachsalchemist.com
This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis:
Podtrac - https://analytics.podtrac.com/privacy-policy-gdrp
Transcript
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: What have the stories you tell yourself, or the prison keeping you stuck? In this conversation, you'll hear how trauma, addiction, and the loss don't have to define you, and how you can finally live beyond your story mind. Hi, and welcome to the UWorld Order Showcase Podcast, where we feature life, health, transformational coaches, and spiritual entrepreneurs stepping up to be the change they seek in the world.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I'm your host, Jill Hart, The Coach's Alchemist, on a mission to help coaches and entrepreneurs Oh, I…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Amplify their voice, monetize their mission, and get visible leveraging podcasts and Substack. Today, we're chatting with Dallas Callas.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Dallas is a 16-hour coach and self-proclaimed emotional baggage handler. After a year that brought cancer, the loss of his wife, home, business, and family, Dallas faced the choice between dying a suicidal alcoholic or starting over at 60.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: He chose to rebuild. Now he guides others to discover that they are stronger than they know, and that it is never too late to create a new chapter. Through his coaching and his book, The Gift is the Present, Dallas helps people move beyond trauma, addiction, and limiting beliefs to reclaim their power and live fully. Welcome to the show, Dallas. It's great to have you with us.
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::Dallas: Thanks for having me, Joe. It's great to be here.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So, let's ask you the big question. What's the most significant thing, in your opinion, as individuals we can do to make an impact on how the world is going?
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::Dallas: live our purpose.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I like that.
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::Dallas: Now, what is it? Because we all know it.
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::Dallas: We live in a world where everybody talks about finding your meaning and purpose.
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::Dallas: For I believe we already know, every one of us, and it's all the same.
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::Dallas: Let's see if we can have an agreement here, Jill.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Okay.
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::Dallas: What does every person in the world… what is their destination? What do they want to get to?
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::Dallas: Ask any parent, what do they want for their child?
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::Dallas: And after God…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Best life.
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::Dallas: Yeah, after doctor, lawyer, whatever, they'll say, I just want them to be healthy and happy.
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::Dallas: Well, I think that every person, all 8 billion of us, are searching for a place to feel healthy and happy. Calm, loving, peace of mind. That's all we want!
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::Dallas: Would you agree?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I do agree.
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::Dallas: I think that's what we are, naturally.
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::Dallas: Everything else is unnatural.
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::Dallas: And I call it the story mind.
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::Dallas: If you look into a brand new baby's face, you and every other human sees the same thing. They see beauty, love, and happiness. That's it.
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::Dallas: They don't see a story, they don't see baggage, they don't see pain and suffering, they don't see some history of experience.
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::Dallas: It's just that being.
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::Dallas: Well, my mother died 4 months ago, and I looked into her face 2 hours before she died.
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::Dallas: I saw it the same as the baby's face.
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::Dallas: I saw beauty, love, and I felt happiness for a life lived.
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::Dallas: Not fear and insecurity and pain and loss and grief.
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::Dallas: Because those are creations of a story, of belief.
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::Dallas: What we are is that baby and that dying mother.
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::Dallas: And in between, what happens to us? We become a story.
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::Dallas: You're a story. I'm a story. If I met you in real life right now, and I said, nice to meet you, Jill, tell me something about your self.
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::Dallas: You would begin telling me some of your story.
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::Dallas: We don't talk about the baby and the mother. We talk about the story that fills the in-between we call our life.
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::Dallas: What we talk about is a movie of us.
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::Dallas: Everything that happens to us from the time we're tiny children, right through to what's happening right now, are parts of this story that we self-identify as.
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::Dallas: That's me. The stuff from yesterday. We are historical creatures.
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::Dallas: It is everything that has happened to us that makes us who we are in this moment.
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::Dallas: And we fully believe, and the story is us.
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::Dallas: So when I'm traumatized as a child, and bullied and abused psychologically and physically.
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::Dallas: I carry that baggage as a part of me.
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::Dallas: It becomes something I identify with and as.
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::Dallas: I identify as the pain, the suffering, the anger, the frustration, and I carry that. We call it emotional baggage.
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::Dallas: Every human being carries some.
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::Dallas: I believe that birth itself may be the initial trauma of life.
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::Dallas: And it brews us in fear and insecurity. Everything we do throughout our life, you can trace back to some fear or some insecurity.
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::Dallas: And we're trying to find a better security. We're trying to relieve some fear. And we call it getting happy by, I'll buy something. And it will relieve this tension or insecurity and make me happier.
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::Dallas: I will fall in love with the right person.
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::Dallas: We're always achieving and reaching outside of ourselves.
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::Dallas: Well, I call it an addiction. All of that.
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::Dallas: Because we all come to the first addiction, we all have the same one. It's called blame.
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::Dallas: I blame… I blame the school, I blame the church, I blame scout leaders and camp counselors, then I blame friends, then I blame my boss, I blame my kids, my wife. I blame the environment, I blame the culture, I blame the economy and the politics.
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::Dallas: Some people go their whole life just blaming the outside world for what?
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::Dallas: For their fears and insecurity, for their baggage, because we don't want to face it.
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::Dallas: And so all addiction gives us a safety, a defense against it. So we don't have to run up against this true pain that is inside of us, our real self.
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::Dallas: You know, in between the beginning and the end, the story is what keeps us in the external world. Everything's out there.
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::Dallas: If I just do this, it'll be better. If I just get this, it'll be better. If I achieve this, it'll be better. If I win, it'll be better. If I'm a success, it'll be better.
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::Dallas: Everything is out there, and we live in this story mind.
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::Dallas: Well, I got lucky!
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::Dallas: Really lucky. I woke up one morning and I had cancer. In the middle of a pandemic.
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::Dallas: Best day of my life!
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::Dallas: Over the next 12 months, I went through treatment, surgery, radiation.
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::Dallas: My wife and I split. I lost a house. I lost our business.
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::Dallas: I lost my family in any way you can see a family.
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::Dallas: And he ended up broken and alcoholic and suicidal, all in 12 months.
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::Dallas: During a pandemic, Best year of my life.
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::Dallas: Because it burned my story to the ground.
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::Dallas: And I had to look at it and go, what did it mean?
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::Dallas: And right at that moment.
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::Dallas: One evening making dinner, a podcast playing in the background, and a man on the podcast is talking about consciousness.
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::Dallas: fluffy, woo-woo stuff that I had no interest in.
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::Dallas: But I heard him say one line!
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::Dallas: And it dropped me to my knees!
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::Dallas: He said, show me yesterday.
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::Dallas: That was it.
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::Dallas: My rational brain had to look at my life, my story.
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::Dallas: And go, where is it? What is yesterday? My whole life was yesterday. Everything about me is what I've been through.
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::Dallas: I can't go to a cupboard and pull yesterday out and go, look, Jill, what do you think of yesterday?
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::Dallas: There is no tangible thing.
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::Dallas: I'm here with you right now, it's tangible, it's happening.
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::Dallas: This is a moment!
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's not actually even happening.
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::Dallas: Well…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: We don't actually exist!
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::Dallas: We can get there!
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: We're having a space. We're having a shared experience.
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::Dallas: Yeah.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: In a space that doesn't exist.
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::Dallas: Right, but that's what led this whole thing, because
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::Dallas: when I couldn't tangibly say, here's yesterday.
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::Dallas: Well, what did it mean? It meant I believed in a story.
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::Dallas: A story, I believe, was so true, it almost killed me.
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::Dallas: And I thought, hold it a second.
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::Dallas: 50 years ago, I might have been abused. That happened. It was a moment in time. Physical reality took place.
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::Dallas: How did it get here?
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::Dallas: Did someone walk behind me holding it in their hands, going, I'm coming! It's right here!
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::Dallas: No!
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::Dallas: How did he get here?
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::Dallas: Well, of course, I brought it!
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::Dallas: I'm the one who took the trauma, gave it meaning, implanted feeling.
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::Dallas: And so I lived in this pain of it. I put it in a bag, threw it over my shoulder, and started walking in life.
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::Dallas: And when I find there is no reality to yesterday, only a memory.
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::Dallas: My god, I can just put the bag down!
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::Dallas: I owe!
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: changed the memory.
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::Dallas: I own it now!
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::Dallas: So I can put it down.
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::Dallas: When I was blaming someone for having hurt me, I didn't own it, so I couldn't put it down.
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::Dallas: As soon as it was mine, I went, oh, so I don't have to carry it.
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::Dallas: This is amazing! I put it down, the pain went away.
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::Dallas: The addiction was no longer needed? The bottle went away?
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::Dallas: My happiness just exploded!
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::Dallas: Because I wasn't carrying all that garbage. There was no reason for it.
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::Dallas: I was just convinced, not only by my own story mind, but the collective story mind, the world we live in.
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::Dallas: So let's bring this to a horrible piece of reality from yesterday's news.
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::Dallas: Where, where, where someone is assassinated, Because of someone's story.
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::Dallas: They believed in their mind a pain, an anger, a suffering, an us against them. This is fear and insecurity.
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::Dallas: We have killed 100 million of our brothers and sisters in the last hundred years.
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::Dallas: Because, collectively, we have believed in stories that made us join armies and go to war.
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::Dallas: Just a story no different than the story that brings me to the edge of suicide, or any other person to addiction, or suicide, or trauma.
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::Dallas: It's all the same!
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::Dallas: And we're taught since children that somehow this complicated world is all about difference. Us and them, right and wrong, good and bad, evil. All these pieces…
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::Dallas: They are just scripts. They are a story. They're played out every day on Netflix. They're played out every year in blockbuster movies. They're the same story.
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::Dallas: We are all the same story.
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::Dallas: In this conscious reality that we're not attuned to. Instead, we're attuned to the story.
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::Dallas: And the reality of us is that baby and that mother's face, beginning and end of life.
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::Dallas: And we have gotten lost in this drama.
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::Dallas: In between.
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::Dallas: And we've taken it so real to us.
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::Dallas: Because from the time when children were told to look out into the world.
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::Dallas: Achieve, pass the grade, pass the test, get to the next one, graduate, get a car, get a house, get a wife, have kids, raise a family. It's all external.
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::Dallas: We are never told to turn the mirror around and say, no, no, no.
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::Dallas: When we're deepest in love, it's internal.
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::Dallas: Not external. It's my love that makes it work, not someone loving me.
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::Dallas: It's my happiness that gets exposed, not something or someone making me happy.
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::Dallas: We don't turn the mirror and look at ourselves. We're constantly pushing it away and saying it to the outside world.
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::Dallas: And so we get horrific scenes like we saw yesterday.
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::Dallas: You know, every leader in the world today
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::Dallas: From Trump to Putin to anyone. They're all… hurting.
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::Dallas: They're all in pain.
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::Dallas: They all want to be loved, and recognized, and supported.
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::Dallas: Just like anyone else. They believe in a story that hurts themselves.
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::Dallas: They're fighting their ego.
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::Dallas: Everyone is!
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::Dallas: But the more we can bring it to a rational thought, That this is belief.
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::Dallas: You believed things 10 years ago that you don't believe today.
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::Dallas: You will believe things in 10 years you probably don't believe today.
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::Dallas: So what is the truth of a belief?
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::Dallas: Of course there isn't! It is just us attaching to it in the moment.
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::Dallas: And it is purely our ability to detach.
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::Dallas: From those things, and see a greater reality, our conscious spirit.
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::Dallas: That we are beauty and love and happiness.
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::Dallas: that Jill is the most important person on planet Earth.
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::Dallas: Because if she wasn't here, there wouldn't be a planet Earth.
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::Dallas: If she wasn't here, there wouldn't be love.
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::Dallas: There wouldn't be beauty, because she wouldn't know of it.
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::Dallas: All 8 billion of us are the most important person.
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::Dallas: We're all trying to cook the same dish!
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::Dallas: Of love and beauty and happiness. We just get lost.
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::Dallas: In the differences. And we poke at them.
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::Dallas: And that's fear and insecurity.
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::Dallas: So my story is quite simple, it's just to wake up.
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::Dallas: to our reality, And know that we are the same person. We are this love, beauty, and happiness.
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::Dallas: And we're just to share it. That's all we need to do. That's all life needs to be.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: How do you think novelty plays into all of this?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah. You're talking about consciousness?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: there's…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: there's several things that I want to address with what you've said, and one of them is novelty, because I think that the consciousness explores novelty through our lives. We're all connected to consciousness, but we all exist.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: as individuals, And then…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I have a thought about the stories that we tell ourselves, and you're talking about the bag over your shoulders, and it came to me that we often like to take that bag down and rummage around in it.
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::Dallas: Huyah!
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Rather than put it down, which is just…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: thinking about the thoughts that we're having that aren't serving us, and telling ourselves the stories over and over again, and memories change. Every time you tell that story to yourself, it changes slightly.
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::Dallas: I know two people experience the same event.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: the same way. So…
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::Dallas: Absolutely.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: You know, and it's often two people or more are involved in a situation, and they come away from it having different experiences with it, which goes back to the novelty piece, but
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: We… we have a lot more power to affect how our lives are going than we give ourselves credit for.
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::Dallas: And it's waking up to the evidence you just showed.
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::Dallas: Because the evidence says it's not real.
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::Dallas: If it were real and singular.
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::Dallas: All of us would have seen the same thing when we saw the same event.
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::Dallas: We don't, because it is not real or singular.
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::Dallas: It is our experience.
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::Dallas: And so, when people go, it's not all in my mind, dammit! You're blaming the victim!
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::Dallas: I say, well, there's a reality that it is all in our minds, because where else could it be?
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::Dallas: Did it come from your foot, your hand, your shoulder? No.
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::Dallas: No, all of this is thought by us.
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::Dallas: And I don't think it's thinking. I separate thinking from thought.
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::Dallas: Thinking is the toolbox brain, the rational, the logical. We learn skills and tools. It's the app store for living, from driving a car, to cooking a meal, to looking after our kids, to doing our job. That's the brain. That's thinking.
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::Dallas: Thought is the arising out of story.
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::Dallas: That's the subconscious that I drop my mug of coffee in the morning, and this voice jumps in my head and goes, you dummy!
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::Dallas: You always do that, you're such an idiot.
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::Dallas: Who the hell is that?
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::Dallas: That is the story mind. That is the ego, the deception, that makes us rummage around in, oh yeah, you're right, I am an idiot.
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::Dallas: That's looking in that baggage. That keeps the story alive.
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::Dallas: Because if you don't entertain thoughts, thoughts vanish.
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::Dallas: They have no strength on their own. You have to attach to them and say, that's me! That's my baby! And so I caress it and say, yep, that's who I am!
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::Dallas: And people say, I can't change who I am, that's just the way I am. That's attached to the thought of the story, not the thinking, rational brain.
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::Dallas: Because almost everyone I work with.
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::Dallas: When we come to those moments.
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::Dallas: I'll say, okay, let's turn on the rational brain for a second. Does this make sense? None of them ever say it makes sense. They all know right away it's silly.
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::Dallas: And then they'll say, but I just can't help myself.
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::Dallas: That's the story, that's the ego deceiver. And we have to attach and take ownership of the thought.
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::Dallas: And then it becomes a spiral, and down we go, negativity, and stewing, and brewing, getting upset, and in arguments, and all these things, based on our deception.
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::Dallas: No rocket's being used.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Thinking about what you're thinking about.
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::Dallas: Yeah, I oughta.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Dangerous process.
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::Dallas: Yeah, I say, are you a thinker or a thoughtter?
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::Dallas: Do you have thoughts, or do you have thinks?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I have thoughts.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I have things that… Flutter through my mind.
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::Dallas: Yeah.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And…
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::Dallas: Alright.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I look at them, and… I will think.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: not… I will think about my thought. There you go. And I will decide, is this worth
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Exploring, or is this just gonna steal my peace?
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::Dallas: And that's called awareness.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yes.
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::Dallas: To be enabled?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: there, it's like a whole different world.
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::Dallas: See, most people, the biggest problem is the thought comes up, and they don't use their awareness.
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::Dallas: Because they recognize the thought as themselves.
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::Dallas: It's only the brain, in awareness, can say, hold on a second, is that thought real?
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::Dallas: That's not helping you. In fact, that's gonna hurt you, or hurt someone you think you love.
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::Dallas: Oh, yeah, you're right, there's awareness.
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::Dallas: And that's the whole…
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::Dallas: Therapy, if you want to call it. That's the whole healing, if you want to call it. That's the awakening. Just simply to be able to be attentive enough to your thoughts.
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::Dallas: To see them.
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::Dallas: And then have the brain show up and say, is that good for you? Okay, forget. And walk away.
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::Dallas: And that's the story of mine. Walk away.
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::Dallas: Who needs a story?
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::Dallas: We don't need a story. We're here alive, right now, you and I. We're loving, beautiful human beings. That's life!
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::Dallas: What's the story?
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::Dallas: Some history? Who cares?
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::Dallas: It has no meaning!
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::Dallas: People living in history live in pain.
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::Dallas: People living in history shoot other people for their views.
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::Dallas: I, I, I wrote this morning on, on, on, Facebook.
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::Dallas: I said, Freedom of speech exposes our fears and insecurities.
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::Dallas: Because that's just what we saw yesterday.
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::Dallas: It's exactly what we saw. And every time we kill, we hurt. In argument, in struggle, in love.
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::Dallas: It's the same thing And we are most afraid of our internal free speech with ourselves.
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::Dallas: Because when we speak freely, it's called honesty.
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::Dallas: And if we're honest between that brain and that thought.
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::Dallas: Between real us and a story, we get scared.
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::Dallas: So we don't want free speech in ourselves.
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::Dallas: And I think this is the reason we see the danger in public.
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::Dallas: It's exposing truths!
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::Dallas: That make us have to think about it.
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::Dallas: And not just accept the thought.
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::Dallas: And we're in struggle there, because there's such fear and insecurity in the basement of all our houses.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I think there's so much lying that goes on, and people's inability to see what…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: What is… what is the rational.
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::Dallas: Right.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: explanation for what happened, rather than… it's easy to just be polarized, or say, you know, they deserved it, or they didn't deserve it, or to have other discussions about the social implications of it.
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::Dallas: Yeah, right.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's… A lot of it is just… that… we… Don't…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: We're lied to so much that we've lost the ability to think does this make sense?
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And to trust our intuition, when our intuition says.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: that's probably not all of the story. I don't have all of the facts. And then everybody rushes out to have, like.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: a part in the conversation, and I was like…
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Maybe we should just be quiet for a minute.
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::Dallas: We all want to be on stage!
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::Dallas: We all want to be heard and seen!
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::Dallas: this whole… discussion of being heard and being seen. To me, it's just silly!
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::Dallas: That's identity, that's ego.
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::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I'm special!
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::Dallas: I need you to see that I'm special. No, I don't!
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::Dallas: I'm loving and happy and healthy and human.
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::Dallas: I don't need you to see I'm special.
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::Dallas: That is pure ego and want, and this is all based in this blame.
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::Dallas: We blame the outside. That is the arguing and everything.
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::Dallas: And we… we are in this boat, you know, when you just mentioned that, why it's so pervasive.
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::Dallas: Well, the collective story… Is addicted to blame.
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::Dallas: It is constantly saying the other is at fault.
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::Dallas: So it's an immigrant, or it's a different colored skin, or it's a different accent, it's a different food, it's different, different, different, you're wrong, I'm right. Fear and insecurity.
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::Dallas: We are incredibly simple beings.
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::Dallas: Trying to pretend we're on a complex stage, a huge theater and movie, and all of these parts.
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::Dallas: And the reality is no.
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::Dallas: When you pick up your child and hug them in your arms, that's life.
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::Dallas: There is no more complication!
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::Dallas: That's it. We don't have to keep searching for all this food that is feeding what?
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::Dallas: the ego!
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::Dallas: The sense that we're not good enough, but somehow we're not worth enough.
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::Dallas: That somehow I must be in judgment and comparison, and live up to some standard.
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::Dallas: No! You already won!
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::Dallas: You're a beautiful, loving human being. You won the whole thing!
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::Dallas: You got the trophy!
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::Dallas: Enjoy this beautiful, loving now!
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::Dallas: Stay out of your memories and the past.
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::Dallas: Stay out of the future and the fantasy of what if tomorrow.
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::Dallas: Just be here! Be awake!
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::Dallas: Be aware! That's all you need!
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::Dallas: I always say to people, we learned this secret in grade 1, the first day of school, and we all missed it.
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::Dallas: Even the teacher missed it, and they gave us the secret.
303
::Dallas: What happens? We're sitting in our chairs that first day of school, and everyone can feel that excitement, and fear, and insecurity, and oh my god, the first day, and all the noise, and all the kids.
304
::Dallas: And our teacher walks to the front of the class.
305
::Dallas: And what happens?
306
::Dallas: Attention, class! Attention!
307
::Dallas: Jill? Present. Dallas? Present.
308
::Dallas: We were just given the secret to life!
309
::Dallas: be entertained.
310
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: hasn't…
311
::Dallas: Be in attention and be present.
312
::Dallas: It was the secret to life, right there.
313
::Dallas: For people who are religious.
314
::Dallas: I said, Jesus gave you all the secret to life in one little statement.
315
::Dallas: The disciples go to Him and say, how do we gain these heights? How do we become these great human beings like you? How do we follow you?
316
::Dallas: Jesus didn't say, well, you have to have goals, and you have to grind, and you've got to have dreams, and you need a nice car, a hot chick, and maybe a Lamborghini in the driveway. He didn't say that.
317
::Dallas: He said, you are the light of the world.
318
::Dallas: We won!
319
::Dallas: We're already here!
320
::Dallas: Love yourself and each other in this moment, and that's all there is. Everything else is fear and insecurity created in your mind.
321
::Dallas: Every pain, every drama, every anxiety.
322
::Dallas: Everything is just that creation in a story you believe.
323
::Dallas: That's not true!
324
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And it's not gonna make any difference when you're gone.
325
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: No! And… And I'm sure that…
326
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Kirk didn't wake up yesterday morning thinking, this is my last day on the planet.
327
::Dallas: Of course not!
328
::Dallas: And isn't it funny, I was saying to someone this this morning, we were talking about this.
329
::Dallas: And I've watched about 5 or 6 podcasts this morning, and everybody, rest in peace.
330
::Dallas: And I think, wow, wouldn't that be great if we taught ourselves to rest in peace now?
331
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: now.
332
::Dallas: To die from the story now, and rest in peace.
333
::Dallas: That is the whole show, and yet we live in a society that says, work for 50, 60 years, get to retirement so you can do what?
334
::Dallas: Rest in peace.
335
::Dallas: The thing we all want, the thing we are, that is covered up and obfuscated by this massive drama we call our life.
336
::Dallas: Is always there waiting for us at every moment.
337
::Dallas: And we all experience those moments of awe, looking at a night sky or a beautiful vista when you're out on a hike.
338
::Dallas: And you just have this moment of just… Oh!
339
::Dallas: Nothing.
340
::Dallas: Not a thought, not a worry, just for a second. Back!
341
::Dallas: is what is always right behind you. That is the blue sky instead of staring at the clouds all day.
342
::Dallas: It's always there for everyone. It's not special.
343
::Dallas: There's no work to be done.
344
::Dallas: It's right there!
345
::Dallas: Just be present, in attention, be awake.
346
::Dallas: I know it sounds silly, in a way, the ease of it.
347
::Dallas: And, you know, I went to hell.
348
::Dallas: And it almost ended my life.
349
::Dallas: For it to open the door and see how simple It was.
350
::Dallas: And there was a moment when I thought.
351
::Dallas: I just wasted all those years living like that, and almost killing myself?
352
::Dallas: And it was this simple?
353
::Dallas: You've gotta be kidding me!
354
::Dallas: And people find this all the time in their life.
355
::Dallas: They'll have some big, traumatic situation, they've got to make a hard decision and get through it.
356
::Dallas: And every time, as soon as you make it, and you take that one step away, you turn around and go.
357
::Dallas: That was it?
358
::Dallas: It was that easy?
359
::Dallas: That final moment.
360
::Dallas: to end something, to quit drinking, to, to end the marriage, all sorts of dramatic, difficult things. The moment they happen.
361
::Dallas: There's this sudden clarity of, That's it?
362
::Dallas: That's all it was?
363
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Kind of a release.
364
::Dallas: No!
365
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: it's like a burden that gets lifted off of you.
366
::Dallas: Putting down that bag!
367
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yay!
368
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's palpable.
369
::Dallas: Yes!
370
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Once you get through the decision process and your current present, It becomes less encumbered.
371
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's… It opens the door to possibilities.
372
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: When you hang on to the past, or you hang on to situations because You're supposed to?
373
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And all the while, you're struggling with, it doesn't feel right. And it's not to say that others are bad or good, because no.
374
::Dallas: No, no.
375
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's all anything, and it's not… it's just that
376
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: in the present that you're experiencing now, this situation isn't serving you anymore. And if it's not serving you, it's not serving them either.
377
::Dallas: Exactly.
378
::Dallas: I mean, you can look from…
379
::Dallas: You know, obesity,
380
::Dallas: The sort of sedentary brain fog, always tired, the massive increase in mental health awareness of young people, being diagnosed left and right with new disorders, the spectrum of life!
381
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Hmm?
382
::Dallas: Not just a mental disorder.
383
::Dallas: All these things are a weight, a physical presence in our bodies.
384
::Dallas: And they are the build-up of a story that's gaining more and more speed.
385
::Dallas: And becoming so pervasive around the world.
386
::Dallas: Everyone worrying!
387
::Dallas: About other countries, other peoples, their own, their life, their family, just constant until the weight is dragging everyone down.
388
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's anxiety. We call it anxiety, but it's… it's global, and it's…
389
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's destroying our relationship with each other and ourselves.
390
::Dallas: We're carrying heavy baggage that's weighing us down physically, and so mentally.
391
::Dallas: I… I say, you come to it. Well, I came to a place where it's… I realized it was…
392
::Dallas: Wantlessness?
393
::Dallas: And needlessness creates weightlessness, and so happiness.
394
::Dallas: I don't have wanting something.
395
::Dallas: I don't need something. Based on, you know, I have clothing, I have a roof over my head, and I have food.
396
::Dallas: I have no other want or need, so there's this incredible weightless feeling.
397
::Dallas: In my body and mind.
398
::Dallas: Because of the simplicity of life, and all of a sudden, it's just… All you find is happiness.
399
::Dallas: Because the unhappiness was carrying that weight, that want, perceived need, all these baggies.
400
::Dallas: All these worries about, like you said, anxiety, tomorrow.
401
::Dallas: Or trauma, the past.
402
::Dallas: You get out of the tomorrow and yesterday, and holy crap, today is wonderful.
403
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: You can just be grateful.
404
::Dallas: Yeah.
405
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And people say, oh, it's too easy, but gratitude changes your body chemically, and it allows you to experience happiness.
406
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: They go hand in hand. You can't be happy unless you're grateful.
407
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I use the situation you're in.
408
::Dallas: I use the word appreciation, not grateful.
409
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Grateful, to me, has one little piece of baggage, and it means…
410
::Dallas: External.
411
::Dallas: I'm grateful because of something.
412
::Dallas: And I try to not attach to anything external. So I say, I appreciate what I have, where I am, what it is, what life is, what you are, I appreciate it. I don't… I'm not grateful for it.
413
::Dallas: Because it's not something I have to have, right?
414
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Right.
415
::Dallas: That's a little distinction, but for me.
416
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I like the distinction, actually. Words have meanings, and…
417
::Dallas: Yeah.
418
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I, I actually appreciate the distinction.
419
::Dallas: Nice.
420
::Dallas: So there you go, it's simple, it's all just love each other and carry on.
421
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Problem solved!
422
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: But if it's not quite solved for you.
423
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: People can hire you to help them
424
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Get all their baggage sorted, and… Dropped off the top?
425
::Dallas: You know, I never say that… I can't teach.
426
::Dallas: I can't…
427
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It's different than teaching.
428
::Dallas: I can't fix anyone.
429
::Dallas: All we do, you're doing it right now.
430
::Dallas: Is helping people maybe just see a different picture.
431
::Dallas: Believe another possibility.
432
::Dallas: Be aware. Examine the thought. And that's all it is, is just trying to throw little pieces of light
433
::Dallas: That might meet with you and go, oh.
434
::Dallas: Hey, you know, that man's hence.
435
::Dallas: You know, that one line from that podcast changed my life.
436
::Dallas: Because it made me, my irrational brain, hit the awareness button and go, wow!
437
::Dallas: So, it can be the tiniest thing that changes us, you know?
438
::Dallas: Often at podcasts, at the end, a podcaster will say to me.
439
::Dallas: I have this question I ask everyone, if you can go back to your 12-year-old self, you know.
440
::Dallas: What would you tell them? I'd always say nothing, because I wouldn't have listened.
441
::Dallas: There's nothing you're gonna say, you know what I mean?
442
::Dallas: See, it can be just this tiny flicker, this little spark that can just inflame someone, and wow, positive or negative, we see this every day.
443
::Dallas: So, I don't teach, I just try to do that. Throwing out little flickers of flame and going, does this make it? Does this work? Does this resonate?
444
::Dallas: I want to change and say, I'm not a coach, I'm a resonator.
445
::Dallas: And so I just throw out these bits, and if it resonates, bing, we click, we start talking.
446
::Dallas: We go down a path together.
447
::Dallas: And if it doesn't, it doesn't. You need to talk to someone else, or you don't. Who else? That's you.
448
::Dallas: So I try and keep it as light as that.
449
::Dallas: Because I don't go looking for a client.
450
::Dallas: You have to be searching.
451
::Dallas: To want to find that little bit of light that lights you up.
452
::Dallas: No one can just bring it to you and go, hey, hey, knock on your door.
453
::Dallas: Excuse me, here it is! It just doesn't work, you know, you've got to be looking.
454
::Dallas: You've got to know something's wrong with that baggage.
455
::Dallas: I really would like to put it down.
456
::Dallas: I need to find what's going on, you know, something has to be poking you and pushing you.
457
::Dallas: And a lot of people, like you say, they get comfortable just rummaging around in the bag.
458
::Dallas: And going, oh yeah, it's scary, but that's me, and then put it back over their shoulder again, forget it.
459
::Dallas: So, you know, that's an amazing ability humans have.
460
::Dallas: We can live an amazing level of pain and suffering and just keep going.
461
::Dallas: Because we are tough, we are resilient, in a terrible way.
462
::Dallas: We shouldn't be resilient and tough, we should say, no way!
463
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Often people that are resilient and tough, they end up sick.
464
::Dallas: Yes.
465
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Because that's… it's our body's way of saying, hey, hey, I've been trying to get your attention, but you… you're ignoring the awareness piece, so here.
466
::Dallas: One of the biggest struggles I have is with, depression.
467
::Dallas: Because people feel it is an illness, and it is a deep, dark space. I have had depression before I got cancer.
468
::Dallas: And for me, I now see it as, no, it's not an illness. It was a wake-up call.
469
::Dallas: It was all that baggage being suppressed
470
::Dallas: Driven down into my body, and my body went, oh my god! It's this empty black hole!
471
::Dallas: It's the worst feeling of your life because it suppresses feelings.
472
::Dallas: You don't feel anything, and we are beings of what? We experience and feel.
473
::Dallas: Everything that makes us happy, sad, any emotion is based on feeling.
474
::Dallas: So when depression suppresses feeling, It's like a horror movie inside of yourself.
475
::Dallas: And that's where we get lost, and I say, THAT!
476
::Dallas: Is the big, wake up!
477
::Dallas: I'm giving you a space. I don't want you to hurt yourself anymore, so I'm suppressing it all.
478
::Dallas: To try and get you to see what's happening.
479
::Dallas: That's a hard argument, I'll tell ya.
480
::Dallas: That's a tough one.
481
::Dallas: Because people are so bought in.
482
::Dallas: to a story that I think we have mistakenly Through psychology, through therapy, called you a broken part.
483
::Dallas: said to you there's something wrong with you. And it's not.
484
::Dallas: There's nothing wrong with anyone.
485
::Dallas: This is a good thing.
486
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: A lot of it's just to sell drugs.
487
::Dallas: Absolutely.
488
::Dallas: I mean, you know.
489
::Dallas: But there's over 60 million Americans right now who believe they are diagnosed with a brain chemical imbalance.
490
::Dallas: Did you know that?
491
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I, I just… insane to me.
492
::Dallas: Medical science… has no way of measuring what? Brain chemicals.
493
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I don't know what the brain… how the brain works, for the most part.
494
::Dallas: And we diagnose people, and I talk to people all the time, and they'll tell me, oh, I have a brain chemical imbalance. I go, really? Who told you? Oh, my doctor said so.
495
::Dallas: Oh, tell me about the test you took. Do you have a readout? I'd love to see it.
496
::Dallas: Well, all of a sudden, there's no test.
497
::Dallas: There's no readout.
498
::Dallas: Where did your doctor go to college, or medical school?
499
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Or… where did they place in the class? I mean, how smart is this person that you're trusting your life with? Because every time you…
500
::Dallas: And scientists.
501
::Dallas: Even doctors and scientists live inside stories.
502
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Mmm…
503
::Dallas: stories in their own profession that they have to meet and fit in with their tribe and their story. Don't think they're something different because we hold them as experts.
504
::Dallas: We all do it. We all live in stories. One of our stories is, the doctor's right.
505
::Dallas: And so we believe the story the doctor tells us, and we tell that story to others. Sit down with people, especially as they get older, and they're all talking about their ailments, and what the doctors told them.
506
::Dallas: And I just… it's hysterical to listen to, to me, now, because I'm outside this story going, oh, I wish you'd all wake up!
507
::Dallas: You're doing this to yourself!
508
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: If you want to live a long, healthy life.
509
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Don't go to the doctor, unless, like, broke something.
510
::Dallas: And don't believe your crap.
511
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And don't believe your crap.
512
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Marissa Pierce says, tell yourself a better lie, because they're all lies.
513
::Dallas: Hey, there you go!
514
::Dallas: Friend of mine, myself and a friend drank every day for 15 years at the same pub.
515
::Dallas: He ended up going down to the streets in fentanyl, and we've seen the zombies on the streets today, homeless. Just a wreck. I assumed he died.
516
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I went through my year of life collapse, I'm sure he thought I died.
517
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I walk into a coffee shop.
518
::Dallas: A little while back, and there he is, sitting in the corner, reading a book, enjoying a coffee like any other person alive. And I'm stunned.
519
::Dallas: I go over and, well, tell me, you know, what happened?
520
::Dallas: A preacher on the street caught his attention, he ended up going to meetings, joining a church, believing in God, his addiction went away, his disorders evaporated, he's happy and healthy. He would say, I was saved.
521
::Dallas: He was saved not by religion, he was saved by a better story.
522
::Dallas: That's all!
523
::Dallas: We all live in stories, whether it's religious, or political, or economic, or social standing.
524
::Dallas: We all just live in stories. When you have a crappy story, you've got two choices.
525
::Dallas: Make a better story, Or forget the story and leave it.
526
::Dallas: That's it. You don't heal, you leave.
527
::Dallas: You can't fix my trauma that happened 50 years ago. I left it. I didn't heal.
528
::Dallas: I didn't heal my addictions, I left them, because I didn't need the pain, so I didn't need the medication to cover the pain.
529
::Dallas: It's that simple!
530
::Dallas: And we're afraid to take that responsibility, that pure, radical self-responsibility, to say, I have done this to myself.
531
::Dallas: Yes, I got hurt 50 years ago, but it ended then!
532
::Dallas: Why should I let it go on? Because I do it to myself.
533
::Dallas: That radical responsibility, that lack of blame, will open the door, will turn on the lights, will wake you up, because you are left with you.
534
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And it's okay!
535
::Dallas: You're just fine. And you're stronger than you think.
536
::Dallas: You can get through any of this stuff!
537
::Dallas: You're okay!
538
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Where's that book back in the… 70s, I'm okay, you're okay?
539
::Dallas: Yeah, yeah, that was a big one.
540
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It was a big one.
541
::Dallas: I think that was based on TM, Transcendental Meditation. It came out of that school.
542
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Did it?
543
::Dallas: Yeah.
544
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It was huge in the early 70s, just huge.
545
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: There's… there's something to meditation.
546
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And everybody's… it's different for everybody, and there's, like, different ways of doing it, but it's… It's…
547
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: A powerful way to allow your brain to, like, connect.
548
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: To each hemisphere, and to get your conscious thinking… thoughts.
549
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: out of the way. And to allow you to think about your thoughts, and move them aside, and recognize, oh, that's just a thought, versus this is…
550
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: this is my story that I'm gonna have to rummage around again, or the conversations that you have with people that you'll never really have with those people.
551
::Dallas: Yeah, I think for a lot of people, that's exactly what it does. It turns off the story for a moment.
552
::Dallas: So they can see clearly.
553
::Dallas: For me, it never worked, because I felt it was a coping mechanism.
554
::Dallas: You know, I could meditate, and I felt good for a moment.
555
::Dallas: But as soon as I stepped out, I was back in my story.
556
::Dallas: So it wasn't healing to me, it was just that,
557
::Dallas: do the breathwork, you know, walk in the forest. I do feel better, it does work, absolutely.
558
::Dallas: But I can't go back to the same position I started. And that's the trick of actually getting out of the story.
559
::Dallas: Disbelieving the past. Disbelieving the memory.
560
::Dallas: We don't remember 75% of our lives right now.
561
::Dallas: So why should we assume that 25% we think we remember is the truth?
562
::Dallas: Why would we?
563
::Dallas: You know, I say to people, tell me… tell me about your day on Tuesday, December 5th, 2020… 2021.
564
::Dallas: Tell me about that day. What did you wear? What did you eat for breakfast? Did you go to work that day? Were you feeling okay? Were you sick? Did you stay home?
565
::Dallas: You can tell me nothing about the day, a whole day!
566
::Dallas: That happened, and you have no memory.
567
::Dallas: But you think something had happened to them.
568
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: For last week!
569
::Dallas: Yeah, but you think something 40 years ago changed your whole life and you can't put it down.
570
::Dallas: This is just an attachment to a story, to a belief, and we don't have to do it.
571
::Dallas: There's no reality to it.
572
::Dallas: You got a psychic scar? Show me. We've opened up a million brains, never seen a psychic scar. Can't find them.
573
::Dallas: They just don't exist.
574
::Dallas: You have to get to that radical place.
575
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So let's tell people how they can find your book.
576
::Dallas: It's on Amazon. DallasCollis at gmail.com is my email, and that's about all I do. I say today, if they've got your name, Jill, you can't hide. If anybody wants to search, they're gonna find you.
577
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And… You're on Substack at dallascullus.substack.com.
578
::Dallas: Okay. TikTok and Facebook and Instagram. Yeah.
579
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And we will put those links in the show notes to make sure people can find you. Thank you so much for joining me, Dallas. This has been a great conversation.
580
::Dallas: Thanks for having me. Appreciate you and your work.
581
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: To learn more about Dallas, visit dallascals.substack.com or one of his Hangouts, TikTok, Facebook, or Instagram, and you can email him
582
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: to get the link to his book, and I will try to put the link in the show notes as well.
583
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: If you have a podcast, or you're interested in starting one to get your message in front of our huge and active audience.
584
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Please reach out to us at support at heartlifecoach.com. We love to help spiritual entrepreneurs and coaches amplify their voice and monetize their mission, and offer a variety of ways to do this with Substack. Join us for our next episode as we share what others are doing to
585
::Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Be the… raise the global frequency, and remember, change begins with you. You have all the power to change the world. Start today, and get visible.
